reflection..sth that you do everytime

I was scratching a pregnant ugly-mixed-of-colour-of-black-and-chocolate cat who always loiter around our rows. She stares idly at the patch of green grass in front of my room and it attracts me on how she manage to lie with her bulging stomach flat on the floor.Truth to tell, she had never attract me - unlike her other kitten who had much more lovelier fur than her..( She was black and chocolate mixed which look rather 'comot' while most of her kitten before have much more brighter color eg. orange and etc..) and much more playful than her. But what attract me is the way she was looking the view..okay I knew this might sound creepy or whatever you might say but the way she was looking out was different..it feels like she already tired of pregnants and give birth and raised her kitten again and pregnant again and..you know repeating the cycle again. The way she looks out vibrating the sense 'im tired..im tired'. So I sat beside her and starts to scratch behind her ear. She looks startled at first - most of us cringe away when she is near meowing for food cause of her looks - but after a few scratch she looks comfortable.

That makes me thinking. Imagine putting yourself on her shoes..(or her paw,literally speaking). She seems contented after a few scratch - she even lie herself in with her back flat on the floor as if wanting me to scratch her body despite her bulging stomach. I can feel how she wanted to be cared or loved like she used to have when she is a kitten..(actually I doubt that cause her fur are not one you would called cute) but she seems cant have it anymore that now she is a mother of many,many cats in my college. She is tired with the cycle..but she is a she-cat, that is her jobs.
She wants loved, but she need to give love to her kitten. When she received a bit of loved ( or in this case my scratch ) she startled at first. How can someone love her ?- no one did, most people 'shooh' her whenever she is near..yet when she received even a bit, she gratefully received. She purred - like saying 'thank you' for loving me..Thanks for showing a bit of loved at me..

So peeps, that is a cat. A she-cat who seems tired but continue living for the sakes of her kitten. Do you know who around you who had the same striving spirit..?

Yeah, our mother.

I imagine my mom. She must be really tired raising all 6 of us who have their own demands and tantrum. Hey , Mom also have their own need. But we all seems to forget that whenever we asks of something. Mom solitary need is to see us happy..and our solitary need is cloth,money,food ,et.... Mom wants to be loved to but she had been given her love to us. When sometimes she wants to spill out her problem to me, I hear her half-heartedly. However when the situation is reversed, I dont even have to said "Mak, along ade problem la.." instead she is the one who'll ask "along ade paper ke nak citer kat emak? " See, how unfair it is to our Mom..

Emak, we really sorry for all the things we had done to you.We must appreciate you more..Thank you for all the things you had done to us..every little thing like giving us a pat after we successfully managed to cook rice without 'hangit' or like making our favorite dish and etc..Thanks mom!!